If you are single, Every Christian’s dating goal should ultimately be… Marriage. Date with a purpose, not just to kill time. If you are entertaining toxic, stale, or even dead relationships just for the sake of being in a relationship, you are only allowing someone to fill a space that God has pre-selected for someone else.
If you are already married, the goal is to stay married forever. No do overs. Don’t be so quick to bail every time you hit a rough patch in your marriage. Christian Marriage Counseling really helps. It has done wonders in my marriage.
It is important that both of you set boundaries and stick to them.
When I was dating, I had a very controlling boyfriend. He tried to control everything about me. What I did, Why I did it, Where I went, Who I was with, When I was to return, and How I lived period! This bothered me, so when I got married, I carried this defensive attitude into my marriage. Just the simplest question from my husband would turn into a big blow up because I was constantly on defense. I was determined not to allow another man control me the way my ex did. But ladies, this is the wrong attitude to have. It’s a matter of being respectful. It didn’t take me long to figure out that this attitude wasn’t going to work in my marriage.
Some people may have friends outside of their relationship, either from school, work, or church. Again… The key here is boundaries.
Pray For One Another Every Day and Pray with one another as well. Nothing says “I Love You” better than praying for someone. If you are single, pray and ask for God’s blessing in your relationship. Ask that His will be done. If you are married, Pray a covering of protection over each other before leaving your home. Your prayers should include asking the Lord to set guardian angels to war and protect your home and your relationship. You have to fight for your relationship … and the proper way to fight is with prayer. When you argue, pray about it! Never get so upset that you feel like you can’t pray with your spouse. In fact, those are the times when you need to be praying the most.
Don’t Hold Grudges. There will be disagreements. I know it’s easier said than done, but forgive each other quickly. The longer you allow an issue to fester, the more difficult it becomes to move beyond it. Work on your issues. Talk about how they make you feel and how they’ve affected you emotionally, physically, or spiritually. Once you have made a decision to forgive, make a decision to leave the issue in the past. Don’t wait for the perfect time to bring it up again.
Any relationship requires communication. Don’t be afraid to voice how you feel and don’t be offended when your mate voices how he feels. Just as long as it’s done respectfully and in love.
If you feel like your mate is slacking or just feel that the relationship is just not what it used to be, don’t be afraid to let them know. The sooner you address the issue, the more likely it can be resolved. Avoiding the issue, doesn’t fix the issue.
Keeping secrets, hiding feelings, and being untruthful are the number one reasons relationships fail. What’s done in the dark will always come to the light. Remember that.
When you are in a Godly relationship, people will notice, trust me. You won’t have to shout it from the mountain top. You won’t have to brag about it. It will be evident by the actions of you and your mate. People are watching what the two of you are doing and most importantly, what you’re NOT doing. Be an example. Yes, being in love is a BEAUTIFUL thing, but lets not forget that you have an opportunity to use your relationship for a greater purpose, to bring others closer to Christ.
Faith should be the root of every Christian relationship. When one’s faith is weak, one may need to lift the other. Encourage your mate to draw closer to God. A relationship should not distract you from God. If it interferes with your relationship with God, there are definitely some changes that need to be made.
Attend Church Together. Marriage is difficult enough without maintaining a commitment to serve God. There are too many distractions and influences that will hinder a relationship without God. Remember your wedding vows.
“Therefore what God has joined together, let no one separate.” . (Mark 10:9)
Being close to God allows a couple to seek wisdom and guidance in their relationship. It also provides a willingness to allow forgiveness to play an important part of your marriage.
Understand that God created us all differently. There are going to be things that you will not always agree on. That’s normal. A difference of opinion does not mean a couple is not compatible. It just means that we all have different opinions.
There will be times when you guys can’t see eye to eye on some issues. Try to be understanding. Compromising a little does not mean you are settling.
Next to God, My husband is first. No one comes before him. He is my best friend. I don’t go around telling another man when we are having problems. I have never ever wanted to cheat on my husband. I am 100% faithful and loyal to my him and I can only pray that he is showing me the same loyalty.
There’s no greater feeling than being loved. Love truly conquers all. The Bible says “Husbands are to love their wives, even as Christ also loved the church”. It’s easy to love someone when things are peachy and rosy, but the real test of love is when things get a little shaky. Do you love them enough to stay and work it out or do you run for the exit?