So many women walk around thinking of themselves as defeated, a failure, unworthy and unlovable. Women sometimes see themselves that way because of past hurts or abuse, because something they had hoped for just did not work out the way they had planned, or because they feel less than others around them.
The problem is once you see yourself that way, you will speak of yourself that way and what that does is condemns you to a life of negativity. It is a cycle that YOU perpetuate.
Here is what I mean. Whenever we activate negative thoughts and words, we create a pigeonhole that keeps us trapped in that negative spiral.
Let us examine the term pigeonhole. The Merriam-Webster Dictionary defines the verb pigeonhole as “to assign to a particular category, typically an overly restrictive one” or “to lay aside”. The Urban Dictionary defines it as “to put something into a drawer/box and forget about it for a long term.” In simpler terms, your negative thoughts and words restrict you, lay you aside so that opportunities consistently pass you by, and trap you in a box.
The truth is negative thinking is destructive. It drains your energy and stops you from moving towards and engaging in positive activities. It leaves you feeling badly, and locks you into believing that you do not deserve more or better.
The same is true of negative words. Proverbs 18:21 says “the tongue has the power of life and death.”(NIV) The Message Bible puts it this way…”Words kill, words give life; they’re either poison or fruit—you choose.” When we say harmful words and/or belittle children, they cry and cower. Very few see it as a call to toughen up and be better than whatever you professed to them. It is the same with our brains and bodies. When we say harmful words etc….our brains and bodies cry and cower…rather than shine and be/become all that God has lovingly ordained for us.
So instead of negative thoughts and words, try positive thoughts and utterances. Replace negative thoughts and words with what God says. Fact is, prosperous women think and speak positively. They think and say only what God says. Why? Because His Word is light (Psalm 119:105) and will lead you through all darkness. It is alive and active (Hebrews 4:12a) and will give you life and keep you going even when you feel low. It is a weapon (Hebrews 4:12b; Ephesians 4:17) and will cause you to bounce forward regardless of the depth of your struggle.
Moreover the Word of God says wonderful things about us as children of God. These very words give life and are the words we should choose to believe. For example, one of my favorite verses is 1 Peter 2:9. Here the Apostle Peter is explaining what God says about His people. He was sharing with them how they differ from the rest of the world. He said “But you are a chosen people, a royal priesthood…God’s special possession” (1 Peter 2:9).
“Chosen people” means God chose you. Not the other way around. And He chose you for great and lovely things. In fact, Jeremiah 29:11 says “For I know the plans I have for you, declares the Lord, plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future.”
1 Peter 2:9 also says you are God’s special possession. According to the Merriam-Webster Dictionary, the word special means “being in some way superior, held in particular esteem, readily distinguishable from others of the same category, designed for a particular purpose or occasion.” God says this about YOU!
As God’s possession He has the responsibility to take care of you. He is your source for all things. In other words, He’s not just money or a shoulder to cry on when things get super rough. You can speak to Him daily and He will reply. In His reply, He will show love, compassion and unmerited favour (grace). Of a truth, like all fathers, He will also discipline but that discipline if you heed makes you stronger and better off for it.
There is more…. The Bible is replete with Scriptures of affirmation that is, affirming how God sees you and what He says about you. The thing to do is to personalise the Scriptures and then speak them aloud over your life daily, especially in the morning before you take on the day. Below are just a few of the affirmations found in the Bible:
“I am rooted and established in Love” [Ephesians 3:17]
“My soul will prosper” [3 John 2]
“I will prosper” [Jeremiah 29:11]
“I am fearfully and wonderfully made” [Psalm 139:14]
“I will bear much fruit” [John 15:5]
“I am the head and not the tail” [Deuteronomy 28:13a]
“I am above and not beneath” [Deuteronomy 28:13b]
“I am a blessing” [Genesis 12: 3]
“I am blessed and highly favored” [Luke 1:28]
“My words are anointed” [Psalm 45:2]
“I have the mind of Christ” [1 Corinthians 2:16]
“I am seated in heavenly places” [Ephesians 2:6]
“God loves me” [John 16:27]
“I am a Proverbs 31 woman” [Proverbs 31]
“I have godly wisdom” [1 Corinthians 3:19]
“I am royalty” [Isaiah 62:3]
“I am alive in Christ” [Romans 6:11]
“No weapons formed against me will prosper” [Isaiah 54:17]
“I do not have a spirit of fear but of power, love and a sound mind” [2 Timothy 1:7]
“I am restored” [Job 22:23]
“I am renewed” [Isaiah 40:31]
“I am anointed of God” [1 John 2:27]
“I am a new creature” [2 Corinthians 5:17]
“I am set free” [Galatians 5:1]
OK so what if the ugly thoughts come back you ask. Well then here’s what you say and say aloud… “I rebuke every evil thought and take them captive to make them obedient to Christ”. (2 Corinthians 10:5) Obedient to Christ there means they (your thoughts) should submit to and conform to what the Bible says (that is, you are royal, chosen, anointed, rooted and established in love etc.). What that does is activates the atmosphere around you based on God’s Word. It is then up to you to be deliberate and bring back to memory what God actually says. This is why reading and meditating on the Word (Bible) is so important, so that in those dark moments you can pull on these affirmations.
And if you still need more…start clapping and singing and giving God thanks. By then a wave of joy would have come over you. You would have forgotten about the evil thought. Equally important, repeat what God says, don’t just think it…declare those affirmations over your life by saying them aloud.
OK so some of you may be thinking, this does not apply to me. If you happen to be one of those women that does not struggle with negative words or thoughts, that is fantastic. However, there may be moments where you find yourself with these negative thoughts and you find yourself saying negative words. Reinforce. Go back to that list of affirmations. As I said before some women live a life of negativity. Others only experience it in specific moments. The reality though is that often times we do it without even realizing it. As of today, let’s change that!
It takes 21 days to form a habit. Over the next 21 days, let’s say and think what God says about us. Not what we say or think. Not what others say or think. Only what God says.