Christian Singles

5 Reasons You’re Attracting The Wrong Guys

attracting wrong guys

You’re on the rebound

It’s possible you may be on the rebound and not even realize it. Did you take time to heal after your last relationship? Hopping in a relationship to get over the last one is not only a bad idea, it’s a contradiction of what the Bible says we should do.

Above all else, guard your heart, for everything you do flows from it. – Proverbs 4:23

Have you ever heard of the term “serial dater”? A serial dater is someone who hates to be alone, so they hop from relationship to relationship just for the sake of being able to say they’re in a relationship.

Some may feel like hopping in a new relationship proves that they have moved on. Not so! The only thing it proves is that you make bad choices.

You don’t set boundaries

As single Christians, it’s important that we set boundaries before we enter the dating scene. Otherwise, we set ourselves up for temptation, disrespect, and sometimes we even allow our values to be compromised. It starts off like this… we bend a little, then a little more, we bend so much that have nothing more to bend.

Put to death therefore what is earthly in you: sexual immorality, impurity, passion, evil desire, and covetousness, which is idolatry. – Colossians 3:5

If someone is moving too fast for you, don’t ever feel like you have to bend in order to keep them. Speak up, walk away, or do whatever you have to do to stay within your boundaries.

You think you can change him

You identify possible red flags early on, maybe even the first meeting, but you figure with a little encouragement and guidance from you, he’ll be on the right track in no time.

Whoever walks with the wise becomes wise, but the companion of fools will suffer harm.- Proverbs 13:20

This is another trick of the enemy. He sends the counterfeit as a tool to distract us from the work God is doing in our lives. Don’t make the mistake of settling for someone you know is not a good fit for you.

Priorities are off

It’s quite normal to desire marriage and to be loved. There’s nothing wrong with that. But let’s be honest, Are you spending way too much time seeking him and not enough time seeking Christ?

 Little children, keep yourselves from idols. – 1 John 5:21

If so, it’s time to redirect your priorities where they should be. Once you do that, God will take care of the rest. But He must be #1 in your life and first in your heart. The Bible warns us that God is a jealous God. There should be no one before Him.-( Exodus 20:3-6 )

Prayer life is weak

Have you surrendered the desires of your heart to God? Key word there is surrender. This means you don’t have to try to force a relationship with every guy you meet.

And this is the confidence that we have toward him, that if we ask anything according to his will he hears us. – 1 John 5:14-15

Pray about it and trust God to work things out according to His will. It may not happen when you want or with whom you want, but know that if it’s God’s will, it will happen exactly when and with whom it is supposed to.

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