If you identify with any of the following, then it could be a sign that there is some work to be done in you if you desire a healthy relationship.
You don’t find yourself attractive
We as women are hard on ourselves, especially physically but getting into a relationship in hopes that it will make us feel more beautiful is not the answer. The truth is that no one person can make you believe that you are beautiful. You have to believe that for yourself.
In relationships, you should not be leaning on a person to validate your beauty and worth, that is not their place and it will drain the relationship. If there is something about your physical appearance that needs work, do what you need to do.
God has made us all uniquely, but sometimes we fail to honor that by lack of attention to our physical appearance.
You hold grudges
You say that you forgive people but it’s just lip service. You are still hoping that God gets them back for what they did to you.
You recall things that happened to you years ago as the reason why you currently aren’t on good terms with people.
This is poison in a relationship. Who wants to be with someone who keeps a mental list of their shortcomings and passive aggressively reminds them on a regular basis? Let it go and grow.
You don’t want to change
You keep saying that you are going to do better but you never quite get there. You are at a stand still spiritually, emotionally or maybe even professionally. You know that you need to work on yourself but you haven’t made it a priority.
A relationship requires growth. What man wants to be with a woman who is not growing emotionally or spiritually? If you are not growing, don’t expect to be with a mature man who is growing and developing daily.
You never pick “good guys”
You have a dream of the perfect guy but in reality you always go for a guy that other people question you about. You are constantly in defense mode about the guys you choose.
Realize that if people are questioning you, it’s because they see a clear difference in what you’ve said you wanted in a man and the guy you are actually with. Maybe its time to examine yourself to find out why you go for guys that don’t meet your standards.
You are unhappy
If you are currently unhappy, why would you want to bring someone else down with you?
Do what you need to do to get to a healthy place and then open yourself up for a relationship.
If you believe that a relationship will make you happy then you will unfortunately find that no man can bring you the joy that only God can bring. It is not healthy to expect a relationship to be your foundational source of happiness. Being unhappy is a mindset, you have the choice to change that.