Celibacy

Christian Singles – 5 Steps to Avoiding Sexual Temptation

sexual temptation

We are starting to see a surge of couples, especially celebrity couples, being vocal about their decision to remain celibate during their engagement. By doing this they are allowing God’s glory to shine in their relationship by taking the focus off them and placing it on God. Overcoming sexual temptations can be challenging but not impossible.

Below are a few suggestions on how to honor God and avoid sexual temptations during your relationship:

Put God First

When my husband and I were engaged, like most couples, we struggled with temptation. Most of the time it was because we put ourselves in certain situations. We had to come to a point when we had to literally ask ourselves, do we love each other more than we love and honor God? When you love someone you will do anything to please them even if that means sacrificing the most valuable thing to you. God wants us to love Him so much that we put our desires and will aside to honor Him and His word. Ask yourself this question… “Is pleasing my flesh more important than pleasing God?  

1 Corinthians 6:18 states “Flee fornication. Every sin that a man does is outside the body; but he that commits fornication sins against his own body.

What exactly does fornication mean? According to dictionary.com fornication is “voluntary sexual intercourse between two persons not married to each other.”  In order for us to put God first, we must obey His word and put it into action by applying it to our lives daily.

Set Boundaries

I know what you are probably thinking, that sounds so old-fashioned, but it actually works. By setting boundaries my husband and I were able to refrain from having sex during our engagement. Here are some suggestions on how to set boundaries: Sit down together and write rules for your relationship.

For example If you know kissing tends to make you really hot and steamy then it’s probably best to not kiss or try to kiss only on the cheeks and avoid passionate long kisses. Set a curfew. The longer you are together the more likely it is for things to happen especially when you are in a secluded place alone. If you find it difficult being alone together then invite other like-minded couples or family with you on dates.

Pray and Fast

Prayer is our direct line of communication to Jesus. It is vital that you pray unto Him expressing your concerns in regards to temptations in the relationship.

Matthew 26:41 states “Watch and pray so that you will not fall into temptation. The spirit is willing, but the flesh is weak.”  

Fasting is often used as a method of consecration. The purpose behind doing this is to build spiritual strength which is vital to the spiritual growth in a relationship to gain the victory over the enemy.

Avoid Distractions

Distractions can be anything that deters your focus. It is important to avoid distractions that would “stir up your sexual desire” which includes TV shows, movies, and music with sexually explicit content.

The scripture tells us in 2 Corinthians 2:11 “That no advantage may be gained over us by Satan: for we are not ignorant of his devices.”

The more we become aware of the devices of Satan, the easier it becomes to avoid. Stay focused and keep your mind on the things of Christ.

Use Self Control –

One of the fruit of the spirit mentioned in the 5th chapter of Galatians is temperance which is defined as “control over actions, thoughts, or feelings.” When we allow the Holy Spirit to operate within us, we are better equipped to handle and fight against sexual temptations. Where there is a will, there is a way. Self-control starts in the mind. Once you determine in your mind what you will do, your actions will follow.

The road to marriage can be a little rocky but with a determined mind, and a desire to please God it will become a lot smoother. If by chance you fall into temptation, know that God is a merciful God and He will forgive you of your sins and restore you, but when we put God first everything else will fall into its proper place. 

But seek first the kingdom of God and his righteousness, and all these things will be added to you. (Matthew 6:33)

Saviela E. Thorne

Saviela E. Thorne

Saviela is the author of "Seasons of a Woman's Life: Devotionals to Empower Women to Become Overcomers". She loves to encourage and empower women through her life experiences.
Saviela E. Thorne

Latest posts by Saviela E. Thorne (see all)

29 Comments

29 Comments

  1. Virginia Chaves

    March 27, 2017 at 11:19 am

    It’s not hard

  2. Kasang Kalmal

    March 26, 2017 at 10:58 pm

    “It’s not by might, nor by power but by my Spirit says the Lord.” Zec 4:6 If you give yourself over to God, then He will grant you self control that keeps you from falling into sexual sins. Once you do so, you will realize how a decade have past without committing sexual sin and be married without doing so. Zion Sharma Viola Nankya

  3. Rumbidzayi Gloria Tigere

    March 26, 2017 at 8:20 pm

    Amen

  4. Alice Robinson

    March 26, 2017 at 7:40 pm

    Amen

  5. Nelo Akirika

    March 26, 2017 at 7:01 pm

    True

  6. Nna Nna

    March 26, 2017 at 3:45 pm

    Amen

  7. Sonya Alexander

    March 26, 2017 at 12:17 pm

    I believe when we look at ourselves as God does it helps us tostay focused, grounded in his word. I

  8. Rose Sehlapelo

    March 26, 2017 at 11:16 am

    Amen thank you for the true word of God.

  9. Conway Kevin Red Bear

    March 26, 2017 at 6:19 am

    Finally, my brethren, be strong in the Lord, and in the power of his might.
    11 Put on the whole armour of God, that ye may be able to stand against the wiles of the devil.
    12 For we wrestle not against flesh and blood, but against principalities, against powers, against the rulers of the darkness of this world, against spiritual wickedness in high places.
    13 Wherefore take unto you the whole armour of God, that ye may be able to withstand in the evil day, and having done all, to stand.
    14 Stand therefore, having your loins girt about with truth, and having on the breastplate of righteousness;
    15 And your feet shod with the preparation of the gospel of peace;
    16 Above all, taking the shield of faith, wherewith ye shall be able to quench all the fiery darts of the wicked.
    17 And take the helmet of salvation, and the sword of the Spirit, which is the word of God:
    18 Praying always with all prayer and supplication in the Spirit, and watching thereunto with all perseverance and supplication for all saints;
    19 And for me, that utterance may be given unto me, that I may open my mouth boldly, to make known the mystery of the gospel,
    20 For which I am an ambassador in bonds: that therein I may speak boldly, as I ought to speak.

  10. Peter Mokabai

    March 26, 2017 at 4:30 am

    Amen

  11. Nakabuye Mary

    March 26, 2017 at 4:16 am

    Amen

  12. Shakira Jesussaves Smithyfergi

    March 26, 2017 at 3:53 am

    Sachica Meggie

  13. Havah Galia

    March 26, 2017 at 1:29 am

    Run, just run like Joseph! Do not argue, do not try to reason, do not rationalize: JUST RUN when you’re faced with temptation, especially sexual ones! Have a honest talk with women and even men who had a wild sexual past or simply got involved in premarital sex during “committed” relationships and they’ll tell you that in hindsight, they’d have rather avoided the abortions, the meaningless romps, the multiple baby’s mamas and papas’ drama, the IST scares and the list goes on. When God forbids or limits something, it’s for our good because he knows better and above all, that we can’t deal with the consequences without being scarred (cf. Adam and Eve who couldn’t bear the sight of their nakedness).

  14. Rebyo Chr Oiy

    March 26, 2017 at 12:18 am

    Amen

  15. Slincious Serwaa

    March 25, 2017 at 11:46 pm

    God’s dwelling place

  16. Cathy Ume

    March 25, 2017 at 11:28 pm

    Amen.

  17. Amanda Lee Plante

    March 25, 2017 at 10:48 pm

    Amen

  18. Erica Fournet-Sims

    March 25, 2017 at 10:18 pm

    Autumn! Copy this ❤

  19. Seis Naomi

    March 25, 2017 at 10:14 pm

    Amen

  20. Cecelia Mofokeng-Mnisi

    March 25, 2017 at 9:55 pm

    AMEN

  21. Jackie Tyrell

    March 25, 2017 at 9:51 pm

    Amen

  22. Belinda Ngoma

    March 25, 2017 at 9:45 pm

    Amen

  23. Jannarosamie Lagare

    March 25, 2017 at 9:41 pm

    Fornication avoid those things beside will experience that when we get married

  24. Gloria Minez

    March 25, 2017 at 9:40 pm

    Amen.

  25. Molly Nonhlanhla Mankinyane

    March 25, 2017 at 9:33 pm

    Great Blog

  26. Pearl Ellison

    March 25, 2017 at 9:32 pm

    Amen

  27. Risha Cooper

    March 25, 2017 at 9:30 pm

    I will not be tempted keeping me to myself Amen!!!

  28. Nayigiziki Merald

    March 25, 2017 at 9:27 pm

    good

  29. Sherie Bailey

    March 25, 2017 at 9:17 pm

    Amen

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *

To Top