No one likes to talk about sex in the church. When I was growing up, the only thing I was taught was “don’t even think about it until you’re married”.
When I found myself single again after my divorce, the struggle got really real, real quick!
I knew sex was for marriage. That I did know. But watching a little porn every now and then wouldn’t hurt right? WRONG!
Many people say that when they hear about someone who is addicted to pornography, they automatically think it’s a man. Pornography is not just a man thing. In fact, it’s becoming more and more common with women. Christian women to be specific.
As for me, It started out being an occasional thing. Then it went from an occasional thing to an every day thing.
At some point, I knew it had gotten out of control. But I was too embarrassed to tell anyone and too proud to get help. I was determined to tackle this thing on my own. After all, it’s not that big of a deal right? ***sigh*** Boy was I wrong!
Here are four helpful tips for the Christian addicted to pornography.
1. Surrender to God
I secretly battled an addiction to pornography for years. At times, I felt like I wasn’t saved because this recurring sin kept me in bondage. I felt hopeless to overcome it, until finally one day I surrendered.
Amazingly, God took that desire away, and I am pornography free today. I was freed from this powerful stronghold by surrendering it to God. Victory is only possible by surrender: surrendering to God.
God promised to give us a new heart and new desires, writing through the prophet Ezekiel, “I will give you a new heart, and a new spirit I will put within you. And I will remove the heart of stone from your flesh and give you a heart of flesh” (Ezek. 36:26).
God will do just that, giving us a new heart with new desires, a desire to obey Him.
2. Get an Accountability Partner
Don’t be embarrassed to confess your sins.
The Body of Christ needs one another, and one example is a married friend of mine. I needed to be held accountable for my addiction to porn, so she volunteered to become my accountability partner.
She wanted me to call her every few days to report how my week was going.
I would have to tell her if I had been into pornography again or if I had remained free from this sin during the week.
If I was watching porn and then I lied to her about it, I’d add more guilt upon myself by adding lying to her. It just wasn’t worth it.
Having someone to reach out to and be accountable to, can help. I called my accountability partner whenever I was being tempted so we could pray together.
3. Fast and Pray It Out
In the Scriptures where Jesus taught the disciples how to pray, He included in this prayer, “And lead us not into temptation, but deliver us from the evil one” (Matt. 6:13).
So we can pray for deliverance from the sin of pornography. Jesus saw lusting in the heart as being like adultery (Matt. 5:28), and pornography is certainly lusting in the heart.
We need to fall on our knees before God for His Spirit to strengthen our resolve to resist this temptation and deliver us from the evil one.
The enemy would love nothing more than to keep us in this pigpen of sin so that our faith would be shaken.
4. Set Boundaries
Pluck Out the Eye… This sounds harsh, but when Jesus said “if your eye causes you to sin, tear it out and throw it away. It is better for you to enter life with one eye than with two eyes to be thrown into the hell of fire” (Matt. 18:8), He was speaking in hyperbolic language or using extreme exaggeration to make a point.
His point is to take extreme measures to get rid of the source of the sin, so if you get your source of pornography on the Internet, get rid of it, or at least find someone you trust to help you set up an Internet filter that’s password protected.
Pornography has no Power over You!
God doesn’t want us to wallow in our sins but to struggle and overcome them.
The good news is that if someone is battling an addiction to pornography and they hate it, that gives clear evidence of the Holy Spirit’s working in them. It’s good to be in a battle over it because this shows their heart’s desire is to live a holy, pure life before God.