Holding On To Relationships That Are Holding You Back

Holding On


I sat there in a daze as I listened to him telling me that his family didn’t think I was good enough for him because I didn’t come from the best background, I wasn’t as pretty as his other girlfriends in his past, and I was just another chick looking for a guy for a quick come up. Really?

Even after hearing this, I still loved him. I wanted to prove his family wrong. I wanted them to see how much I loved him unconditionally. I wanted them to finally get to know the loving, funny, and hard working woman I really am.

But that didn’t happen. After dating him for over 2 years, he ended up marrying someone he had known for only 4 months. He said he knew by their third date that she was the woman he wanted to spend the rest of his life with.

As I enter the dating scene again, I can’t help but wonder what I could have done differently. Why wasn’t I the one he wanted to spend the rest of his life with? Was I too skinny, not pretty enough, or not smart enough?

After all of these questions raced through my mind, I had to face one simple fact… God does not make mistakes.

When I start dating again, the man God has for me will love me for me… flaws and all. My past won’t hinder our future. Where others may see deficiencies, he will see beauty. He’ll recognize that my worth is not defined by who I work for, what I drive, or the clothes I wear.

While I’m not perfect, I’ll be perfect for him and that’s what will matter.

When I start dating again, I won’t fight so hard or go to great depths to prove to others that I am worthy. Either they accept me as God made me or they don’t… and even if they don’t, I will still know my worth. According to Gods word, “I am complete in Him” (Colossians 2:10)

When I start dating again, I will make sure God is my number one focus and I will not let anything or anyone come along and take His place in my heart. I can’t say that this has always been the case though.

Sometimes we have to go through horrible things, to get us to focus on the things we should have been focusing on all along. 

When I start dating again, I will consult with God about my decisions and choices. I’ll pray for guidance and wisdom. I’ll pray that He reveals the true hearts of those who cross my path and protect me from those who mean me no good.

When I start dating again, I won’t be so quick to give my body to someone who doesn’t deserve me. My body is sacred and that’s why I’ve decided to wait for the “one”. Not for my boyfriend, not for my fiancé, but for my husband. I understand that a lot of men will consider this a deal breaker, but the man God has for me will wait for me.

You see, had my focus been on Him all along, I would not have missed some very important caution signs.

Through prayer and discernment, I would have known 2 years ago that this relationship was going absolutely nowhere. (okay maybe not 2 years ago, but you get the point right?)

When I start dating again, God will be my #1 priority!