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Five Godly Ways to Deal With Your Enemies

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Dealing with someone who dislikes you is never easy. It is like walking on eggshells. You are very uncomfortable and always uneasy because you’re constantly butting heads. It is bad enough if it is a co-worker or boss but It is even more difficult if we live with the person(s) and cannot avoid interacting with him/her. So as Christians, what do we do? How do we handle such situations?

Here are Five Godly Ways to Deal With an Enemy:

1. Avoid the conflict

As soon as we see it raising its head – walk away. It is often hard to do since everything in us is screaming to react and to make ourselves heard. But we should always pause, take a breath and quickly ask ourselves: will what I am about to say really help the situation? Will what I want to say and what I actually say be the same? What about the way that it might be said? What about the non-christian onlooker? What will s/he think? Of even greater importance, will God be pleased?

Paul says in Romans 12:18: “If it is possible, as much as it depends on you, live peaceably with all men.

In other words – as Christians, we should avoid conflict once we can. The Bible says in Ephesians 4:26: “be angry and sin not“. So while we have no control over what the other person does or says, we can control what WE say or do. We must remember that God has called us to a standard of Godly living and we must uphold it even in the face of conflict.

2. Do not hold a grudge.

There is nothing worse than having your mind in mental turmoil because of someone. You are seething with anger and sulking and the person is having a merry old time. Holding a grudge is a choice really and God has warned us against such behavior.

In Ephesians 4:31, it says :“Let all bitterness, wrath, anger, outbursts, and blasphemies, with all malice, be taken away from you“.

In other words, as difficult as it may be – LET IT GO!

3. Do not try to get back at the person.

That is not our job! How does this fulfill “living peaceably with all men”? A Christian should NEVER take matters into his/her own hands. We are not God!

His word is clear in Romans 12:17,19: “Repay no one evil for evil. Commend what is honest in the sight of all men. Beloved, do not avenge yourselves, but rather give place to God’s wrath, for it is written: “Vengeance is Mine. I will repay,” says the Lord”.

Stop playing God and leave it alone.

4. Continue doing good to/for that person.

Yes, you read that right. We will not feel like it. We will hate it. But God commands it! And He says why. Proverbs 25:21 says:”If your enemy is hungry, give him bread to eat; and if he is thirsty, give him water to drink; for you will heap coals of fire upon his head, and the Lord will reward you.” In other words, our kindness and love will confuse him/her. At the same time, we must also remember that these very actions, as difficult as they may be, are the ones that will show our Christ-like nature; that will show Christ in us. And God has promised to reward us for obeying Him in this regard.

5. Take the matter to God.

This should be the first thing that the Christian does. Remember, nothing is too small or too trivial for God. That is why He is there.

The Bible says in Philippians 4:6-7: “Do not be anxious about anything, but in every situation, by prayer and petition, with thanksgiving, present your requests to God. And the peace of God, which transcends all understanding, will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus“.

When we take it to God, He will give us the grace to endure. He will give us the grace to do the four things (among others) mentioned above. He will give us the grace to continue shining for Him in the midst of enormous pressure.

There are those who will say that we are living in a fool’s paradise to deal with a situation like this in this manner. But like Paul, the question we must ask ourselves is this: “Am I now trying to win the approval of human beings, or of God? Or am I trying to please people?” Like him, our conclusion should be “If I were still trying to please people, I would not be a servant of Christ.”

Be blessed today!

Simone Williams

Simone Williams

Simone is a high-school teacher who loves reading especially the Bible and spending time in prayer.
Simone Williams
69 Comments

69 Comments

  1. Tina Keys

    April 7, 2017 at 2:07 pm

    Amen

  2. Raiza Garchitorena Lopez

    April 7, 2017 at 12:25 pm

    Anne Erica Bialoglovski Orolfo ❤

  3. Danna Morris

    April 7, 2017 at 11:45 am

    Lauren Davis 🙂

  4. Yvonne Newsome Dunn

    April 7, 2017 at 11:03 am

    That’s all U can do!!!

  5. Santa Garcia-deolloz

    April 7, 2017 at 8:59 am

    Albert Deolloz

  6. Yenny Calderon

    April 7, 2017 at 6:54 am

    Amen! This is exactly what i needed to read at this very moment!!

  7. Teresa Orr

    April 7, 2017 at 5:41 am

    Ariel

  8. Monica Makuvise

    April 7, 2017 at 4:43 am

    Well said amen

  9. Lillyrose Crichton

    April 7, 2017 at 3:45 am

    Bible say, when this things happen , it’s a testing of our faith, it is very hard to deal with people like this, but give it to God.

  10. Chantal Nahi Mana

    April 7, 2017 at 3:31 am

    Rachel Glaydor Linda Love Morris Mercy Maya Joe Elizabeth N Johnson

  11. Shelly Thomas

    April 7, 2017 at 2:23 am

    Amen!

  12. Ebby Shanks

    April 7, 2017 at 1:49 am

    Dominique Shanks

  13. Nicolle Valles

    April 7, 2017 at 12:39 am

    Pamela Geren

  14. Hà Yeo

    April 7, 2017 at 12:16 am

    Elina Laosemese

  15. Shequitah Simmons

    April 6, 2017 at 11:49 pm

    Brandice Allen

    • Brandice Allen

      April 6, 2017 at 11:53 pm

      Yes on all these things and I like seeing the scripture all in one place. I choose to live by all of these. Sometimes it’s easier than other times. Although, I do think enemy is a very strong word. And I think there should be a #6 Listen with patience after taking it to God. This step is sometimes the hardest for me.

    • Brandice Allen

      April 6, 2017 at 11:54 pm

      Jennifer Martin Perry Christina Lawrence these are the things we’ve talked about 😘

  16. Ellah Reu Cabaya

    April 6, 2017 at 11:39 pm

    Great article! Amen

  17. Desiree Mcalpin-webb

    April 6, 2017 at 11:13 pm

    Through it all,the enemy is after our integrity. God showed me this and it is helping me tremendously. Praise God.

  18. Janan Rush

    April 6, 2017 at 9:10 pm

    Congratulations Whitney Graham Lowe!!!!!! I’m so happy for you guys!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

  19. Rogath Lovin

    April 6, 2017 at 7:52 pm

    Sometimes it’s very had

  20. Tiny Jenny Pumkin

    April 6, 2017 at 6:36 pm

    God let there be peace in my life and family

  21. Hà Yeo

    April 6, 2017 at 5:24 pm

    Great article. I love it.

  22. Terry Daley

    April 6, 2017 at 5:03 pm

    Thank you Jesus Amen

  23. Nana Adwoa Glory Shech

    April 6, 2017 at 5:02 pm

    Jennifer Adakudugu

  24. Winnie Calvert

    April 6, 2017 at 4:47 pm

    Amen

  25. Brina Doc

    April 6, 2017 at 4:28 pm

    With Love & Kindness .,

  26. Beverley Van De Venter

    April 6, 2017 at 4:08 pm

    Amen

  27. Els Swartbooi

    April 6, 2017 at 4:02 pm

    Amen

  28. Betty Carson

    April 6, 2017 at 3:39 pm

    Amen mama thank you

  29. Jasmine Walters

    April 6, 2017 at 3:35 pm

    Jesus gave us the number one way to “deal” with our enemies: Love them! 🙂

  30. Cathy Ume

    April 6, 2017 at 3:17 pm

    Amen. Thank you Jesus Christ.

  31. Catina Ann

    April 6, 2017 at 3:09 pm

    Natalya

  32. Virginia Boloma Dube

    April 6, 2017 at 2:52 pm

    Amen

  33. Muuaa Muharukua Mungunda

    April 6, 2017 at 2:52 pm

    this was my answer to my prayer today…thanx a lot.

  34. Njeri Macharia

    April 6, 2017 at 2:40 pm

    So I am going through this situation at the moment. I have tried to walk away from the conflict and I have had very bad thoughts about getting back and this morning I asked God for the grace to not act on my thoughts. I completely relate to everything written here. I didn’t do anything to pay back but because it is causing me more harm and making me bitter by day, I have just decided to look for somewhere else to stay before I do something I might regret.

  35. Muthoni Muturi

    April 6, 2017 at 2:30 pm

    Terry Mwaniki, Terry Mwaniki

  36. Sina Joshua

    April 6, 2017 at 2:25 pm

    So help me Lord, you know my heart show me your way

  37. Sarahliz Mawia Jones

    April 6, 2017 at 2:24 pm

    This s amazing, may The Holy Spirit help me deal wth my enemies, Amen.

  38. Franciee Cheskah Ngute

    April 6, 2017 at 2:23 pm

    Amen

  39. Heather Morrow Followell

    April 6, 2017 at 2:08 pm

    ❤️

  40. Jones Inamorato Toteng

    April 6, 2017 at 2:04 pm

    Lillian Pitoro

  41. Sarah Keene

    April 6, 2017 at 2:02 pm

    This is a great article. It is SO hard practicing these principles when dealing with someone…not Christian like who’s doing everything they can to tempt you to react.

    • Sarah Keene

      April 6, 2017 at 2:03 pm

      Katie Burke i loved this article.

    • Sina Joshua

      April 6, 2017 at 2:19 pm

      I agree with you Sarah Keene it’s so hard I personally want nothing to do with these type of people. Lord help!!

    • Sarah Keene

      April 6, 2017 at 2:23 pm

      3. Do not try to get back at the person.

      That is not our job! How does this fulfill “living peaceably with all men”? A Christian should NEVER take matters into his/her own hands. We are not God!

      His word is clear in Romans 12:17,19: “Repay no one evil for evil. Commend what is honest in the sight of all men. Beloved, do not avenge yourselves, but rather give place to God’s wrath, for it is written: “Vengeance is Mine. I will repay,” says the Lord”.

      Stop playing God and leave it alone.

      4. Continue doing good to/for that person.

      Yes, you read that right. We will not feel like it. We will hate it. But God commands it! And He says why. Proverbs 25:21 says:”If your enemy is hungry, give him bread to eat; and if he is thirsty, give him water to drink; for you will heap coals of fire upon his head, and the Lord will reward you.” In other words, our kindness and love will confuse him/her. At the same time, we must also remember that these very actions, as difficult as they may be, are the ones that will show our Christ-like nature; that will show Christ in us. And God has promised to reward us for obeying Him in this regard.

    • Sarah Keene

      April 6, 2017 at 2:24 pm

      Those two really resonated with me because It’s very challenging not to react and treat them bad and try to hurt them back for hurting me!

    • Sina Joshua

      April 6, 2017 at 2:30 pm

      Number 4. I’m the opposite, I stay away from them, so guess that’s not showing Christlike nature

    • Sarah Keene

      April 6, 2017 at 2:32 pm

      adding them to your prayers helps (in time) I had to pray for 2 specific people for like 2 years before I actually meant it and felt peace. At first I prayed they got hit by a bus…but eventually i prayed for them and their families and positive good things lol.

    • Sandra Deltaprincess

      April 6, 2017 at 4:17 pm

      Hmm Im dealing with this right now. I’d rather just keep away from them . But even when I try to forget the way they treat me , some how they alwAys find a way to do something to get a reaction from me . Been quiet all this while , just ignoring them and have bn praying hard for God to take away the anger i feel. But honestly I’m losing my patience , BIG TIME!!!

    • Sarah Keene

      April 6, 2017 at 4:19 pm

      I was just telling my friend, it’s CRAZY to me that i’m in my almost mid 30’s and STILL deal with mean girl bullies. Jealousy and insecurity is still running strong in these women. I really hope to not be dealing with this in my 60’s too!

    • Sandra Deltaprincess

      April 6, 2017 at 4:20 pm

      Lol @ praying for them to get hit by a bus know .. I think I’m still at this stage

    • Sarah Keene

      April 6, 2017 at 4:21 pm

      I couldn’t imagine going out of my way to make another person uncomfortable . I’ve got a family, a job and too much on my plate to put energy towards that!.

    • Sandra Deltaprincess

      April 7, 2017 at 10:37 am

      Well I hear that’s enough reason to make them act as they do . They want what u have .. Just sad really .. they’re so unhappy with their lives, they try to make u unhappy too. Just like u said earlier it’s VERY hard been a Christian with ppl like that . Especially when ur still just starting to build ur spiritual life.

    • Tina Keys

      April 7, 2017 at 2:07 pm

      Amen

    • Sina Joshua

      April 8, 2017 at 8:32 am

      Wow Ladies, so guess we all dealing with the same thing lol.. but that’s what I’m doing praying especially since I declared that 2017 is going to be a big year for me and my family and I don’t want anything to hold me back cause let’s face it if we holding on to thing’s and we don’t forgive God will never bless us. So just like God sent people to bless us. The Devil send people to mess us up, I even spoke to this person and I was practically convinced that they never had and don’t have a problem with me “we never clicked since day one cause ever time there’s a problem it gets talked about me instead of talking to me so I’ve been keeping my distance. But after this I realised that we must believe people the first time when they show us who they are, and not what they say they are. God bless them that’s really the prayer I pray cause I’m going somewhere and I don’t want unforgiveness to hold me back

  42. Vivian Atiri Otieno

    April 6, 2017 at 1:37 pm

    Debbie Trixie Oyugi please read with love

  43. Triza Muiruri

    April 6, 2017 at 1:33 pm

    Amen

  44. Meena Joseph

    April 6, 2017 at 1:20 pm

    Yes I’m injured by family but God healedme and gave peace.

  45. Steve Fowler

    April 6, 2017 at 1:20 pm

    amen

  46. Gail-Ann Henry

    April 6, 2017 at 1:17 pm

    Amen

  47. Randy Tuten

    April 6, 2017 at 1:14 pm

    Scott Sheffield

  48. Pearl Ellison

    April 6, 2017 at 1:12 pm

    Amen

  49. Melissa Oberholzer-Hieronymus

    April 6, 2017 at 1:11 pm

    Kelsea Ralston Kalie Ralston Kortlyn Ralston this is what I now do and it’s changed so much for me and my inner peace . Love you girls to the moon and back

  50. Lesego Prudy Mametse

    April 6, 2017 at 1:03 pm

    Amen

  51. Chrishay Goyco

    April 6, 2017 at 1:02 pm

    Betty Carson

  52. Peggy Baloyi

    April 6, 2017 at 1:01 pm

    I receive the peace from above, yes I’m injured but, I will remain in the game

  53. Oliver Nakyejwe

    April 6, 2017 at 1:01 pm

    (1) praying for them, (2) giving them daily bread

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