I have been married to my husband for 16 years. The first 10 years of our marriage were absolutely wonderful. We have two beautiful daughters. At the 10 year mark, he had a 6 week affair. I was devastated, but we went to counseling to try to work through it. Things did get better for a few years. We started going to church together, I learned about God, grew in my relationship with Him, was baptized, and became very involved with my church.
I found out that my husband had been using drugs, looks at pornography, even of teenaged girls. This caused a lot of problems in our marriage, and things continued to spiral out of control from there. To add to already huge amounts of stress, I have been dealing with a terrible, progressive illness that leaves me homebound the majority of the time. I have been through 5 major surgeries hoping for a cure, including brain surgery. Throughout all of this, I have leaned on my best friend of 25 years for support and advice. She has been there for me through it all. Last summer, I began to suspect that my husband was cheating again, all of the signs were there. He of course denied it, but it was obvious from his behavior. My best friend told me repeatedly that I should “kick him to the curb because he cannot be trusted.” She did everything in her power to convince me to leave him, but I held on in the hopes that I was wrong. This went on for months. I went to her house unannounced and sure enough, caught my husband naked with her, my very best friend. Even caught red handed, they both tried to lie their way out of it. That was six months ago. I asked my husband to move out, and I filed for divorce, as much as I hated to, I felt it was my only choice. We are separated, and she is separated from her husband as well. They continue with their relationship, regardless of how many people are hurting from it. They both refuse to talk to me. She laughs at me when she sees me because I “won’t get over it”. Our children are on the same ball team, so I have to face them three times each week. They admit they are still together, but act like they are not in public. And to top it off, she is an elementary school teacher in our small hometown. Our entire town knows that this married teacher had and is still having an affair with my husband. They both say that our marriages are ” just a piece of paper” since we are separated. I feel overwhelmed with sadness and betrayal, each day is like torture. I pray and pray and pray for strength, for wisdom, and for God to show me what to do. The pain is almost unbearable. I pray for God to open their eyes, and even pray for their relationship to end. But it has been so long, and each day is harder than the day before. I’m staying active in church, doing God’s work, helping others, praying. It seems like the more I dig in, the closer they get and the more pain I feel. I am not hearing from God, and I feel hopeless.
Please pray for me.
- I Know This is What I Was Born to do, BUT… - July 18, 2018
- Thank God For His Mighty Protection - June 18, 2018
- God Knows What You’re Going Through - December 19, 2017