I usually don’t do this, but this was heavy on my heart. One of our readers left a prayer request last week which left me literally in tears. It read:
im 57 yr old woman. from day 1 i have been treated bad. bukkied by kids, a mom that hated me. i married to get away and he beat me for 20+yrs. a guy finally comes along and rescues me. no wait! hes a mental abuser from hell. i have prayed all my life and God just hurts me worse. i prayed for a miracle on my way home from work last nighte and it ended up in chaos and pain. god hates me. i havent gone into detail. the more i believe the more he lets people hurt me. god seems to protect these evil monsters. they are just fine and my heart and soul are broken. i cannot pray anymore. its pontless. how many tears and prayers does it take? none, if ur bad. theres not enough prayers if your a believer. he just stands there watching me get kicked. im nothing. i want to die. i cannot keep going on. its too much for a person to bare for so long. do u hear me god? ever? even once? do u see whats happened due to ur lack of interest? ive been good to evryone and i mean it. i knew how bad it hurt to go without or be treated bad. why doesnt god do the same? please dont quote some bible verse. the end result is the same. me, getting kicked. r u happy god? taking a good person and turning her to bad? is that what u wanted all this time? i cannot take it anymore. thanks god, for turning ur back on me almost evryday. do u feel happy that ive given up? or u gonna punish me more for sayin the truth? YOU ARE MEAN TO GOOD PEOPLE! U R GOOD TO EVIL PEOPLE! sometimes people call upon dark forces for help bcuz they know they will come. why dont u show up??? where r u god? whats the matter with u allowing this to happen when i pray for the mighty power i know u have? why????
My heart goes out to you because you’re too hurt to realize just how much God truly loves you. These things happen to all of us. The good and the bad. Let’s not forget Jesus was crucified. Maybe in all your pain lies the answer you’ve been looking for. God doesn’t hate you. He just wants you to quit looking for everyone and everything to complete you. You are already complete in Him. I’m not a psychologist, but just by reading your prayer request, It appears that all of your life, you’ve depended on others to rescue you and then when they failed you, you blamed God for allowing it to happen.
1. “a mom that hated me. i married to get away”
2. “ a guy finally comes along and rescues me. no wait! hes a mental abuser from hell.”
When we depend on others to rescue us or complete us, we walk right into the enemy’s trap. Remember, just as God sends people into our lives, so does the enemy! He preys on those who are spiritually weak. Strengthen your relationship with God and the enemy will find someone else to mess with.
On the other hand…I do believe God sends certain people through certain things, not to tear them down, but to strengthen them for the journey He has for them. In other words, You have an opportunity to capitalize on your negative experiences by helping others through theirs. Start a support group, charity, blog etc. Share your experiences with others who are going through the same thing. You’ll be surprised how healing it can be. I hope this helps. You’re in my prayers. God bless you!