Ever feel like you’re just going through the motions of life? At times you may have even felt like giving up.
I consider myself a young adult in Christ at the ripe age of 43.
I know that GOD has my back. I know that HE has never failed me.
I know that my family has been beyond blessed over countless generations.
I know that despite what I deserve, HIS grace and mercy has sustained me.
I know all of the cliché’s: “no test, no testimony”; “no storm, no story”; “no mess, no message; “what doesn’t kill you makes you stronger” and so on. But, when you’re going through something who wants to hear that?
I know that sometimes until we learn the lesson we have to keep re-taking the “test”.
I know that the Bible is full of believers who endured things that would have knocked us out from the jump in this day and age.
In my personal life and the world in general I see so many similarities of what has already been written.
Even knowing all that I know I can’t say I understand all of the time. I can’t say I don’t get angry at GOD. I can’t say I don’t get angry and disappointed at those I love. I feel guilty for even thinking my previous statements, however HE already knows the areas I struggle with.
I don’t understand those things in life that break you to the core. The things that hurt so bad you can’t seem to catch your breath.
I don’t understand terminal illnesses, the unexpected death of loved ones, natural disasters that destroy whole cities and break communities down to nothing.
I don’t understand how families who were taught to work hard and save are losing their jobs, savings and homes at alarming rates.
Racism, domestic violence, families torn apart, terrorism…I don’t understand. I could keep going, but I realize that some things are not meant for me to understand.
Through it all, GOD is just so good! Just when you feel like you can’t do it alone anymore, He reminds you that you never had to do it alone in the first place. HE had you and “it” all along. See HE never leaves us or forsakes us.
It is usually us who throw the tantrums and decide to run the other way when things don’t work out according to our plan. We withdraw from Him and lose faith and harbor bitterness because we don’t understand.
I had been so angry for the last few weeks I wouldn’t even listen to my gospel music, I didn’t want to study the WORD and reluctantly went to church. In the moment my feelings mattered, however GOD had already planted a seed.
As much as I wanted to run the other direction I put on Martha Munizzi. I turned it up as loud as I could stand it to attempt to drown out my thoughts and the cares of life. As I started singing at the top of my lungs, I heard myself say (cause I was singing waaaayyyy louder than Miss Martha):
“Cause YOU made a way where there was no way. YOU gave me joy down in my heart to stay. YOU changed my life and I never will be the same, and now I’ve got to lift my voice and say…YOU’ve been so good and I really wanna thank you Jesus YOU’ve been so good and I really wanna thank you Lord”
Several months ago we were studying the book of James (the seed was planted months before I even knew I’d need it).
What came to mind was …
James 1:2-4 – Consider it pure joy, my brothers and sisters, whenever you face trials of many kinds, because you know that the testing of your faith produces perseverance. Let perseverance finish its work so that you may be mature and complete, not lacking anything. Consider it pure joy, my brothers and sisters, whenever you face trials of many kinds, because you know that the testing of your faith produces perseverance. Let perseverance finish its work so that you may be mature and complete, not lacking anything.
I can get angry when those I love are hurting. I can get angry when I see our world in it’s current state.
The anger however should motivate me to activate GOD’s word in my life and not sin.
When trouble comes, instinct will push you to turn away from GOD so you can “fix” it your way. We don’t like being uncomfortable. We worry about what others will think if we wait on GOD.
The enemy will have you isolate yourself…what better way to bring in doubt, confusion and sin. Separation from GOD will surely open the door for you to feel guilt and shame for your anger, for your questions and for trying take control of things.
No matter how versed you are in your studies of the Bible or how wise you are in years we all still need GOD’s guidance.
James 1:2-4 tells us that we will experience “stuff”. In fact it says we will be faced with “stuff” of many kinds. It does not say that tests will be the end of us or that we will only be tested once. It states our faith will be tested to produce perseverance. Through perseverance we will become mature and complete. This process is ongoing however victory is our reward.
Know that things will happen. People will disappoint you. Jobs will come and go. Your heart will be broken. There will seem like there’s no way out or up…but GOD! HE is faithful! HE is merciful! HE is the head doctor! HE never leaves us and HE loves us even when we throw our tantrums and run from HIM.
Thank YOU GOD for always being there for me and never giving up even when I did!!!