It was a serene Saturday night as I was on my way to church for a Young Adult Ministry engagement. The topic of discussion that night was: “Finding Purpose.” I was listening to a powerful song entitled, “Let It Be Known” by gospel artist, Casey J . The first line of her song simply says, “Let it be known that our God saves.” As I was chanting this simple yet provocative line, all I felt was intense and immediate impact. Before I could comprehend that another car had collided into me, I was swirling in circles several times over into the middle of the interstate. With my head being tossed around like a rag doll’s, I had but a few moments to make peace with the fact that this was it for me.
In that surreal whirlwind, an unspeakable calm took over me as I kept saying, “Okay, God. Okay, God. Okay, God.” My life didn’t flash before me, my loved ones didn’t come to mind, what was undone hadn’t come to my thoughts, like many people who encounter near death experiences say—for me, it was a moment that just included me and God as I negotiated through understanding and accepting that this was in fact my last moment on this earth.
But God. Finally, only by His incomprehensible Grace, I came to a stop. This stop was feet away from where I was initially driving. This stop was in the middle of a busy and moving rainy interstate. This stop was directly in front of moving traffic. I knew I couldn’t stay in the car because it refused to move forward at this point, so I got my bearings together and walked out of the car and attempted to cross the interstate by foot. Leaving my car in the middle of the highway, I grabbed my purse and literally dodged trucks and cars as I made my way to the side of the highway.
By this point, calm had left my body. As what just happened settled into my bones, my nerves became fluid. There is no way that I should have made it out that car alive, but I did. There is no way that when my car spiraled into oncoming traffic that this accident did not easily become a multi-car pileup. God surrounded me, my spirit, and my car in every way.
The next few days were emotional, to say the least. I found myself crying at random points of the day and night as I maneuvered through many hefty feelings. Thinking about how calm I was at the closeness of death, gave me tranquility and assurance that though I am young, I have had a great and meaningful life–that made me overcome with emotion. Thinking about how afraid and alone I felt once I made it over the highway, reminded me of how much God stands with me– He made me feel loved. Maneuvering through the aftermath and arrangements of the accident overwhelmed me. God divinely ordered every one of my steps through the process– He comforted me. Meditating on the timing of every single part of that accident and how I was shielded from my dangerous surroundings gave me a new understanding of the supernatural power of God– He covered me in the midst of it all.
More than anything, this accident made me reflect on not simply living, but having life and being a part of this life. As I dismissed my car in the middle of the interstate and saw such damage to something that once looked so sturdy, I realized how small of a thing this vehicle was and how much effort I put in to work hard enough and long enough to have enough to pay for it. I, like so many of us, have been so consumed with the stuff of everyday, the to-do list, the bills, the accounts, the worry, the preparations, that I have allowed those tiny things to be bigger than my life.
The devil literally tried to stop me from getting to my purpose. But God is so much more powerful than the enemy, and He is so much more capable than a horrific accident. As long as we are in His will, if He knows we haven’t fulfilled our complete purpose on this earth, grace will always find us so that we survive. So the next time, we get consumed with irrelevant things in our lives or find ourselves trying to survive something that seems bigger than life itself, let’s lift up this simple prayer to remind us who God is and how grand He is:
Dear Heavenly Father, thank You for gifting life to me today. Thank you for being a God that still saves. Remind me that You are bigger than what I am trying to survive. You are so good for having my escape route already mapped out. Thank you for loving me enough to protect me and shield me. May my life be a continuous expression of gratitude for what You have chosen to do in and for me.
In Jesus’ name we pray.